5 Lies We Believe About Ourselves

So, we beat up on ourselves. A lot. A voice inside our head tells us that we’re not good enough and we believe it. You know it’s true and you’re sick and tired of believing it. Me too. Me too.

How could I possibly achieve this goal?

No, I’m not going to get a raise.

No, I’m not going to get the promotion. 

You are so stupid.

Something bad is about to happen because it’s all going too good.

No one will ever love me.

You’re worthless and will never be successful at anything that you do.

That last one was a bit harsh, huh? Sadly, I have heard that thought too many times to count and have become crippled at the sound of it each time. Maybe, you too, have heard one of these sayings or different variations of them. Here are the 5 lies we believe when those negative thoughts come into our head.

• I will never be successful. Think about this for me. How is success measured? By how much money you make? By how big of a house or how fancy of a car that you have? Wrong. I used to think those things, too. Success isn’t measured by tangible, monetary items. How do YOU want you and your family to be successful? Serving in church? Participate in more community events? Strive to eat at the dinner table every night? There is no right or wrong answer to being successful. Pray and ask God to remove the desire to be successful with money, titles, or whatever it is that keeps you from thinking you’re unsuccessful.

• I am unattractive. This is an important one. Similar situation above. How is attractiveness measured? We are in a society where we look at Instagram and see models, celebrities, beauty and fashion icons and think, yeah, nope. We think we will never look like that and so we are automatically unattractive in our own eyes. Hey y’all, GUESS WHAT?? Just because you don’t look like them DOES NOT mean that you are unattractive! I really wish words like “skinny,” “thin,” “heavy,” and “large” weren’t used to describe a person’s appearance. Imagine if we replaced those words with “strong,” “charismatic,” “handsome” and “BEAUTIFUL.” The key is to honestly and truly BELIEVE that you are beautiful, no matter what you look like. Because you are. It’s your heart, personality and passion that makes you, you. Not your looks. Pray and ask God to show you how He sees you when you look in the mirror.

• My past defines my future. This one is tough and can be a sensitive subject to a lot of us. We have been hurt. We have hurt someone else. We’ve gone through a traumatic event. We’ve been beaten down in some capacity. We are paralyzed and constantly reminded by it and don’t think we can ever get past it to be truly happy. No no, my friend. That is the farthest from the truth. Although it was hurtful what may have transpired in the situation(s) you are thinking of, it happened for a reason. If you are no longer in communication or no longer have a relationship with someone, God separated them from you for your own well-being. Because He loves us. It took me a few years to understand this. Maybe you have made a mistake but cannot fathom ever letting yourself be OK with it and moving on. It happened. Ask God for His forgiveness and move on. Learn from the past but do not let it define you.

• I won’t find love. Love, a powerful thing. So powerful that we crave it and need it at the same time. This lie we believe may have the most emotion attached to it because being lonely is, undeniably, a horrible feeling. I know this. All I can say to you is that if you find yourself believing this lie that you won’t find love, you just haven’t found the right person yet. You’ve heard it a thousand times. God loves you. Keep a good balance of family and friend life so that you are assured that you have love there. Romantic love is out there. Don’t ever give up hope. Focus on your family, yourself and your walk with the Lord. Pray and ask God for the right person to come along and that He will be preparing you for them.

• I can’t be myself. I love this one because I am a recovering people-pleaser. Growing up, I had no problem being myself up until about 18 when I left home and went to college. I was not grounded in faith nor confidence of who I TRULY was, so I changed in order to fit in with different people. Well, it couldn’t have been more obvious now that I look back at that time. I felt that I needed to be like a certain person for them to like me. Why is that?? Well, 1. is fear of rejection and 2. is that maybe my real self isn’t good enough and they won’t like me. My friend, the greatest part about you is that you are YOU. There is no one like you. YOU are the only one with your fingerprints, so think that way about your heart and your personality. Identifying what makes you you and owning that will completely flip how you think about this lie. Being yourself is the best thing you can be. Be a good person. Be helpful. Be kind. Be compassionate. Be a listener. Be a disciple. Pray and ask God to bind all negative thoughts you have about yourself.

These lies have defined us for some time. I want to SHOUT IT FOR ALL OF THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK. That is the devil, y’all. That slimy, slimy slime ball who ONLY wants to tear down our happiness and achievements. You feel great about yourself or your achievements and there he comes, without fail, on your coattails ready to mock and paralyze you in your own mind.

BUT WE BELIEVE THE WORDS THAT WE HEAR. Why is that?? Because our conscious is WAY more powerful than we give it credit. And also because the evil that is the devil is VERY real and VERY powerful. His sole purpose is to tear down each and every one of us who are in pursuit of Christ. He can’t have that. He WON’T have it. Buttttttt. SPOILER ALERT. Christ has defeated death and already won!!! HALLELUJAH, PRAISE HIS NAME! So, the devil will NEVER win and we have to stand STRONG against his evil schemes to inject self-doubt and criticism into our minds.

Ephesians 6:11-18 reads, “Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints…”

We have to consciously put on our armor of God daily both physically and mentally. The devil is lurking around waiting for the opportune moment to get you when you are weak and vulnerable. Do not give him the satisfaction!

Life is short enough as it is. Let’s stop believing these lies and start living our lives to the absolute fullest. Pray and ask God to reveal the unique qualities about you so that you can own them. And OWN THEM, you rockstar.

Grab the 3 printables I use daily for goal setting, scripture memorization, and devotionals!